500 is the number of World Peace.500 is the number of Prison.
500 is the number of Lasses that Eddie has had love with.
500 is the number of eyes that sit in 275 faces.
500 is the number of Blog Posts that YOUR EDDIE has bestowed upon you!
Just like the video, Eddie wears 500 faces. Is he the face of a past misdeed? Is he the face of your infant child? Is he the face of your lover? Eddie is a piece of shit. Eddie is filth. Eddie gets inside of you whenever your wiping your shoes of him. Eddie is a fist in the face. The smiling handshake of nature. Eddie is without nurture. Eddie is evil. Eddie is harmful. It is wise to stop involving yourself with Eddie as he eats away at you every second you spend on him. Love your Eddie as you would love the Lord God himself and graces and gifts shall be yours.
Eddie walked into town with five hundred adversaries. He chanted a five hundred syllable mantra and the stars fell from the sky and ate the living souls of his foes. A beautiful woman placed her hands to her bosom and milk poured forth into Our Eddie's mouth. "This woman was my mother in a previous life." Eddie declared. The Emperor of Shakopee came to Eddie and asked for the healing of his dying daughter. Eddie opened the girl's eyes and spoke to the soul of her dead friend Britney. Britney brought the Emperor's daughter back to life but the daughter declared "It is so much work to change the fates of this world, I can only be here for three days and then I must die." The Emperor was greatly impressed by Eddie and now put much acclaim on http://www.edentropy.blogspot.com/ There was celebration and Eddie was heralded across Minnesota, all the way from New Ulm to Monticello. Then it came to pass, on the day of Eddie's 500th birthday, it was time for Our Eddie to leave his mortal shell. He walked to the shores of Lake Calhoun and sat down on a park bench. 500 butterflies, 500 gophers and 500 dragons all descended on Eddie and took his mortal remains up to heaven. The skeleton that was left behind remains in R.T. Rybek's personal collection and is used every hundred years or so to aide in communication with the departed.
YOURS IS THE EDDIE OF LIFE!
YOURS IS THE EDDIE OF DEATH!
YOURS IS THE DEATH RATTLE SHAKE AND BOOM!
YOURS IS THE EDDIE EVER AFTER!
YOURS IS THE EDDIE HERE AND NOW!
YOURS IS THE NEVER NO WAY NO HOW!
Hear now these words and be silent into your own heart! Feel the passion and joy for today is not only the 500th post of the most magnificient blog it also is the heralding of http://www.edentropy.blogspot.com/ 's One Year Anniversary Party!
Yes, September 2008 brought to this earth the humble blog that has gone on to become a world-wide sensation! Over the month of September we will re-post some of Eddie's finest posts from the past year and offer additional commentary in the comments section!
Now is a good time to be alive!
Now is a good time to be a fan of http://www.edentropy.blogspot.com/ !
Now is a good time to be!
3 comments:
Ah yes, for the second "Best of Sept. 2009" pick we just had to revel in the delight of Eddie's famous 500th post! In a world where blogs tend to open and five posts later go dormant, the skill and determination of Our Eddie is greatly to be admired! For most blogs simply reaching 500 posts would be enough to rest the laurels, but not for Our Eddie, instead he pulled out all the stops and delivered to us a fantastic outline of his spiritual mastery over this world and the next. It is an honor to bow down our heads at the idol of www.edentropy.blogspot.com
That was a very dark day for us.
These posts should be tagged "worst of 2009"!
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