Bibble Study Pat Three: Loaves and Fishees

One of my favorite of the Bibble stories is the story of Violent J and the loaves and fishees.  At the Gathering of the Juggalos, the Mormon Juggalos were sad because they only had loaves and fishees while all the other hot Juggalos and Juggalettes had beer and meth.  Well, Violent J (J for Jaysus) saw the sorrow of the Mormon Juggalos and Juggelettes and spake thus unto them; "Be not sad my beautiful Juggalos and Juggalettes, I am Vilent J the light and way to our Lord Godz yo!  If thou layest down thy loaves and thy fishees I will work miracles unto them if only it is that you believe." 

Angry Boner, a Mormon Juggalo spake thus in return; "Violent J, I hear your words unto us and yet I call bullshit.  Even the amazing poer of the Lord God as it moves through you and all the Insane Clown Posse be not enough to transmute the base lame shit into hot drugz and booze." 

It came to pass that Vilent J then delivered the message of the Lord's wrath unto Angry Boner by beating his ass unto the ground. 

"Be there any more unbelievers among you?" Asketh J.  The other Mormon Juggalos shook their heads and with a wave of his wand Violent J worked magic unto the loaves and the fishees and brought in their place delicious Papst Blue Ribbon Beer and Skrank in their stead.

It was a time for rejoicing!

The moral of this Bibble story is that it would be most sad to be at the Gathering of the Juggalos without booze and skrank.

Juggalo of Faith

New sermon from Rev.Last Rite Posted 10/07.

Whoop Whoop Juggalos!


October is here and you know what that means, It is our Anniversary!!!

For 5 years now Juggalo Faith has been spreading the good news, the message that you can have eternal life and how to get to Shangri-La (Heaven).


The message of the cross and of God's love, about the way that he provided for all of us to be with him forever.


Jesus the Christ (Messiah) and how he came to earth to teach us how to live and how to believe by the power of his miracles and the healings he performed.

All you have to do is believe Juggalos, that he was and is the true son of God. and that he died upon the cross to take the death that we all deserved to have upon ourselves, he took the pain from beatings and the shame that we all should bear for the way we live.



Jesus came in our places Ninjas, so all we have to do is remember and believe that and thank him for what he did and ask him to spiritually come into our hearts and we will never face death, just eternal everlasting life with God our Father and Jesus the son in Heaven.



If you want counseling on how to except Jesus by saying the sinner's prayer, email us at Juggalofamily@Juggalofaith.com with "I want to be saved" in the message line and we will talk you through it.



Remember nothing is too big for God to forgive and if you truly mean it in your heart he will forgive you for your sins and you will be saved.



God bless and Keep your Hatchets High Ninjas! Rev.B-Lotus



Watch for a new sermon in a few days from yours truly!


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